• Alice Rose

Why it's OK to take 'The Easy Route'

I normally just talk about fertility struggles and how to cope, but this is important while you’re going through treatment, struggling to conceive in general, pregnant, a parent already…or just a person finding things are just a bit much, whatever your current scenario, as we build up to Christmas. This is for you.

Sorry for the swear. I felt it added something important for the perfectionists amongst us!

I have always, and I mean allllllways had a real Christmas tree. As children we would trek to a garden centre and spend ages ensuring the correct ratio of bushy girth to just-the-right-height. It was tradition. Ritual. Lugging it home in the car watching Mum and Dad trying to shove it in the Christmas tree holder and unearthing all the beautiful/ancient decorations was all part of the fun.

I adore real Christmas trees. But then I grew up and had to buy them myself and realised that if you want a really good one they’re actually kind of expensive and to be honest it’s a bit of a ball-ache to do all the lugging/ shoving when you’ve got 93 other things to do.

This year…I made an executive decision. My parents had a spare fake tree lurking in their cellar. We are on a budget. They were coming over anyway…could I break with tradition, and ask to borrow the fake tree?

It doesn’t sound like a big deal. But it was. It really was. Because my pre-conceived Christmas tree ideals had to be abandoned to achieve far greater overall happiness! Why was I putting all this pressure to get this bloody tree when I could have a free one delivered directly to my house?! Reader: we did it. We got the fakey. And I felt LIBERATED!!

My tree looks lovely. I created time, headspace, saved energy (physical and otherwise!) and saved money too.

While I love spending time on creative projects and I know how much worth there is in it, sometimes it comes down to priorities. Spending time creating a beautiful tree, making your own wreath or a Christmas cake from scratch could be joy-filled, mindful and jolly nice activities. But if that’s not the case for you: THAT IS OK.

Here’s a way to decide whether to put loads of effort into Christmas, or whether you can let go of perfection and embrace a new way of channelling energy:

Ask yourself:

- Who am I doing this for?

- What will I get from it?

- Will it make me more or less happy if I take the easy route?

If you want to maximise your chances of really enjoying this festive period, could giving yourself the gift of time, ease and freedom by opting for the path of least resistance help?

Today we’re having a Christmas drinks party. I went to Lidl yesterday and – although momentarily disarmed by ‘seasonal foliage’ (positively screaming: ‘Buy immediately!! Make homemade garland! Charm party guests!!) I managed to remember that I am in fact horribly “craft-challenged”; silently chanted ‘take the easy route’ and resisted the lure of an entirely unnecessary, time-sapping (likely-to-be-shit) project, instead cheerfully filling my trolley with ready-made mince pies and pre-mixed Gluehein.

So. For those effortlessly whipping up Insta-worthy home-crafted decorations and stunning tasty Christmas ‘bites’ while actually enjoying it all– hats off to you. I am truly in awe. But for the rest of us, let’s release perfection and relieve the pressure this Christmas by creating time, using it to enjoy being, eating, giving, singing a good old fashioned carol and watching Christmas movies.

Merry Christmas x

If you’re currently going through a fertility struggle and you’re worried about coping with Christmas, I made a podcast episode about it featuring Life Coach Emily Hodge .You can listen here or just search for the TTC Life Raft wherever you get your podcasts (ook for the one with Christmas in the title). Find me on Instagram or Facebook where I'll be supporting and empowering you throughout the Christmas and New Year period.

Take care, Alice.


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